Addiction
by 024Maria
Summary: College student Bella Swan is having a hard time fighting her inner demons and figuring out what's best for her.
1. Chapter 1

**Somewhere down the road…**

* * *

Bella answered the phone for what felt like the hundredth time that morning. Her voice was upbeat, cheery, warm, inviting. Ironically, that's the opposite of how she felt.

She'd been acting for so long. Too long. She could no longer differentiate between the Bella she is on the outside and the Bella she is on the inside.

This weekend job was starting to take its toll on her. She felt it in the way her breathing picked up when she walked into the office every Saturday, the way her leg restlessly bounced up and down throughout her shifts. She wanted out; she needed out.

Unfortunately, something inside of her was nagging her to stay. She had a reputation to uphold: Employee of the Month. Funny, last month felt like ages ago to her.

Bella took the pile of mail in front of her and grabbed the envelope opener. She aggressively starting ripping them open, carelessly tearing one of the bills. When opening a UPS envelope, her letter opener gave. She tossed it in the corner with a huff, and ran her fingers through her long dark hair.

She was going to get in trouble. What is the protocol on breaking office supplies? As if she knew. She didn't break things – this wasn't her. She's the perfect girl with the perfect work ethic.

No.

That would be lying. She was a mess, a walking disaster – a lie – a huge fat lie.

Bella picked up the letter opener, strewn on top of a yellow folder.

Bella stared at the forgotten folder in the corner. She hated the color yellow; it always bore some sort of negative vibe in her eyes. She much preferred darker colors, such as blue and gray, as her wardrobe would indicate.

She scrutinized the opener, hoping to salvage it, and sighed. The plastic had broken off of the end, displaying the blade.

Naked.

Bella was suddenly overcome with a weird feeling.

The blade glinted in the too-bright office lighting.

The letter opener was naked, but beautiful. The sharp edge dangerously exposed.

All Bella had to do was place it against her skin, and with a little pressure, she would be overcome with a sweet, sweet, sweet sensation.

* * *

**A/N Hey guys, Chapter 1 will be posted in a few, it's up and ready. Please leave a review :) Follow me on Twitter 024Maria**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Hey! So, I've had this story brewing in my mind for quite some time... let me know if I should continue writing it or not. It's going to get angsty as it rolls along, but it's going to have a build up. Please R&R. :)**

* * *

Bella quickly dropped her phone so the screen was pressed down in the itchy comforter, effectively minimizing the light it was exposing. Her father, Charlie had stirred in the bed beside her, making her heart beat faster. Charlie, a business owner, was only in attendance because her mother, Renée, had requested his presence on this road trip across the country.

When Bella was positive her parents were both soundly asleep once more, she pressed a button on her Blackberry, and turned it toward the third chapter of _Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire_, unable to fall asleep due to her excitement.

At 7:00 am, her alarm sounded, waking up her parents as the sun was peeking through the slit in the curtains on the opposite wall. Renée sat up right away, and nudged her husband before slipping out of bed and retrieving her fully charged phone from the bedside table. Bella sighed and put her sweater on before heading toward the tiny bathroom before her parents got to it first.

Once her teeth were brushed and her bun readjusted, she took one last glance in the mirror and smiled. This is it. Her family was going to drive the final distance to her new home today, and tomorrow she would be moving into the student residence of the university.

The car repacked with all of Bella's belongings that she deemed important enough to bring, Charlie took the wheel and commence the final leg of the road trip.

"These radio stations aren't any good," Charlie mumbled as Renée fumbled with the tuner. "Bella, can you plug in your iPod and play some of _our_ music?" he asked, insinuating that he wanted her to play some oldies.

"No," she replied simply. She had to reboot her iPod the week before and all of her playlists were deleted, the only songs she put on it were the ones her parents would comment negatively on and change as quickly as possible. She didn't think it was a good idea to start off a promising day by letting her parents hurt her feelings.

Bella plugged her earphones into her old Nano and flipped to Milo Greene. She needed something soothing to keep her eagerness at bay. She didn't want to make her parents aware of the fact that she was happy to be starting this new chapter in her life, a chapter that didn't involve them whatsoever.

She watched road sign after road sign, the distance between them and their final destination decreasing with time. She bit her thumbnail, then her focus turned onto her cuticles. She scrutinized them for a moment before reaching for her left ear, unfastening her earring with purpose. She placed the end behind the end of the earring in her right ear, and held the stud between her thumb and index finger. She started by piercing her cuticle of her index finger on her left hand, sticking the earring right through and pushing down and sideways, then lifting, ripping her rough skin, the edges stretched.

She broke each one, and then proceeded to break her thumb cuticle in two difference places with a practiced maneuver. She put her earring back in her left ear and replaced the backing. It was now time for the fun part. She lifted her hand to her mouth and bit off each piece, ripping them in a way that they were wholly removed to bare more nail, the skin not peeking through red and raw. She accidentally bit off too much of her pinky cuticle, causing it to bleed. She hastily stuck it in her mouth, blood making her woozy.

"Mom, where's the box of tissues?" she asked, her hand now hidden in her lap, as her eyes were roaming in the car in search of the cardboard box.

"On the floor somewhere," Renée responded, turning around and taking her shades off.

"Umm, no…"

"Bella, stop biting your nails, it's not a nice thing to see," she said, exasperated, having noticed Bella's hand in her lap. Bella rolled her eyes, wishing she could read without getting carsick so she wouldn't have bit her cuticles in the first place.

"I was bored," Bella said in annoyance. "You do it, too."

"I don't make myself bleed, Bella. Just paint your nails and you'll eventually stop."

"Maybe," Bella replied in a quiet voice, noticing a passing road sign that indicated they were almost at their destination.

Renée turned back toward the front and held Charlie's right hand briefly before letting go.

* * *

"Umm, okay, according to this map, if you take a left turn at the next light, it's right there!" Bella said excitedly to Charlie.

"Are you sure? I don't want to have to turn back in this traffic," he responded with a huff, impatient and sick of driving.

"I'm sure," she assured him with a huge smile. She quickly got rid of her smile, not wanting to hurt her parents' feelings. This was it. Once they rolled into the drive, she'd unpack her belongings, say her goodbyes, and be on her own until Christmas vacation.

Sure enough, her directions were accurate and they were in a long line of cars waiting to take up a spot in the unloading zone. A woman approached the car and knocked on my father's window. He pressed the unroll button with a scowl.

"Hi, I'm Tanya and I am the head R.A for this residence building. Welcome, and I hope you have a great move in! Name?"

"Swan, Isabella," Bella piped up from the backseat.

"Okay, Isabella… looks like you're in room 402, your bed being the one on the right. Now, your wait should probably just be another ten minutes or so before you reach the unloading zone. Once it's your turn, our Orientation Leaders will unload your belongings and bring them up to your room for you. See you soon!"

"Thanks," Bella managed to get out before Tanya walked off to the next vehicle with a nod.

"So you're sharing a room?" Renée piped in. "I thought you were more of a single room kind of gal?"

"I am. There was a huge price difference between the two, so I figured I would tough it out for a year…"

"Good luck!" Charlie responded with a chuckle. "She's going to request a room change within a week," he said to Renée.

"Hey, I'm right here!"

"I think it's good that you're try –" Renée started before being cut off by a young man with red, green, and yellow face paint, and a reddish-brownish beard opened my door and yanked a stunned Bella out of the car.

"Are you in Science?" he practically yelled in her face.

"Yeah?" Bella responded in a small voice, her face frozen in shock.

"YES! Come with me!" he ordered as he dragged her toward a door, giving her no choice but to follow him.

Bella could faintly hear her father turning to her mother and saying, "You let him take her?"

* * *

Bella closed her eyes and reopened them, trying to get used to the lighting change. The bizarre man had let go of her arm and was rummaging through a basket of envelopes on a table.

"I was told you were living on the fourth floor, right?" he asked her without turning around.

"Uhh, yeah…Room 402… Who are you exactly?"

The mysterious man, turned toward her with a huge grin, envelope in hand.

"I'm your new best friend."

"Okay?"

"I'm your faculty orientation leader," he said simply.

"What does that even mean?"

"I already told you – it means I'm your new best friend. Now, come on, let me show you where your room is, or are we going to stand here while I repeat myself all day?"

He walked pas her toward the door at the end of the hall. Confused, a red-faced Bella hurried toward him, more questions on the tip of her tongue then she had a mere ten minutes ago.

"You never told me your name?" she asked, as she was a few feet behind him.

Without slowing, he merely pointed over his shoulder toward the top of his back, where in black letters, read "Heart Stopper"

"Your name isn't Heart Stopper," Bella returned in disbelief.

"Yep."

As they walked down the hall, the volume increased significantly with each step. All of a sudden, they reached the stairwell, which was full of people wearing bright colors, yelling and banging the walls.

"Freshman! Freshman! Here's another early bird, guys! Welcome to the best place you'll ever live!" one girl yelled, her hair dyed a bright shade of purple.

"There's a line of cars outside, Explorer. You should go get a frosh or two," Heart Stopper told the purple-haired girl enthusiastically. He then turned toward Bella.

"Come on, we have four flights of stairs to walk up and I'm on a tight schedule."

"Whose is she?" another hyper man asked Heart Stopper while passing a box labeled 308 to the next person up the stairs.

"Mine."

"Lucky! I haven't met any of mine yet." He high-fived Heart Stopper.

"Ha, that's fucking crappy, this is the second one I get from the car, bro."

They continued up the stairs through a mass of people who were way too happy at this time of morning.

"Yours?" Bella pipes in after they continue up the last set of stairs toward the fourth floor.

"You're my frosh," he stated simply, smiling. "You're mine to mentor, to pass on my wisdom onto, blablabla."

He held the door open for her, and told her room was second on the left. She walked down the hall and stared at the door, which had a sign with her name written on it and a sign, which read "Rosalie Hale".

She noticed her bags and boxes were propped up on the wall by her door.

Bella turned toward Heart Stopper with a sigh. "I don't have my key card yet."

Heart Stopper rolled his green eyes and moved in front of her, whipping the card out of the white envelope, swiping it in one graceful motion. He then moved to the side and waved his arm gracefully toward the door, as if he was showing it off for auction.

"After you."

"Thanks," Bella responded before turning the handle and walking into her new room for the next eight months.

Bella stared at the plain room and sighed. "It's…"

"It's nothing much, but trust me, it'll feel like home sooner than you know it. You'll love it here," he said as he tossed the envelope onto her desk.

"Anyway, everything you need is in the envelope and I'll be around throughout the next two days to meet all of you and get to know you between moving everyone's shit up the stairs. There will be a meeting in the floor lounge tonight. Be there. And… I think that's all. Later, Isabella."

He started out the door as she corrected him.

"Bella."

"Hmm?"

"My name is Bella."

"Okay, Bella." He walked down the hall and she heard the door close at the end of the hall.

"This is going to be interesting…" Bella said as she started moving her stuff into her room and slowly unpacked.

"Knock. Knock."

Bella turned toward the door, noticed her parents warily standing in the doorway, unamused by the boisterous Orientation Leaders yelling and singing all the way up the stairs.

"Hey."

"Who's the cute guy with the red hair and nice body that just walked out of your room?" René asked with a wink.

"Ugh, Mom, really?" Bella replied.

"So, this is your room?" Renée mused as she looked around. "It's small."

"Thanks, Sherlock."

"Hey, watch the sarcasm; that's not how you make friends," Charlie scolded as Bella rolled her eyes.

"And stop the eye-rolling!"

"Eye-rolling is merilly form of self-expression, Charlie," Renée defended, hands on her hips.

"Don't even get me started. You know she got that bad habit from you."

"Pish posh. She has your –" Renée started before being interrupted by her daughter.

"Who's hungry?"

Charlie and Renée shared a look and Charlie sighed before turning to his impatient daughter.

"Actually, we need to head out. We want to make the trek quickly so we don't miss more work. We have jobs, you know."

Bella gave a small smile and nodded her head in understanding. "Yeah, well, I guess this is it then."

Her mom rushed up to her and gave her a quick warm hug. "Have fun and study hard, okay? Don't be a stranger. If you're not ready for this, you can come straight home. No problem with that," Renée whispered into her ear, pulling Bella's loose hair behind her ear.

Bella clenched her teeth. She disliked it when her parents implied that she wasn't ready to be so far away from home at the age of nineteen. "Take care," Bella responded, uncomfortable and ready to be alone. She hated goodbyes more than she hated Jersey Shore.

Renée gave one last squeeze and stepped aside. Bella wasn't expecting her father to hug her so she was quite surprised when Charlie stepped forward and enveloped her in a bear hug.

All she could think about was the fact that she couldn't even remember the last time he had hugged her. It must have been years ago.

He wouldn't let her go, his hug lasting an awkward minute or so. Bella had to tug away, offering her his hand instead. He firmly shook it and told her he was looking forward to her visit at Christmas.

Bella followed her parents out the door and down the stairs. As they walked out the front door, Bella continued down the hall toward the room marked "Cafeteria".

She definitely wasn't eager to eat cafeteria food, but her stomach was making way too many embarrassing noises for her to put off eating any longer.

* * *

Bella strutted into her new room, alone, and froze in the doorway when she realized her roommate seemed to have moved in. The other side of the room was now full of beauty products and clothes. Bella noticed that her roommate didn't seem tom have any personal knick knacks like books, or pictures anywhere, which probably meant she was going to go home every few weekends.

Just as she was staring at the expensive new duvet cover her roommate had on her bed, she walked in and gave Bella a dirty look.

"Hi," Bella said, her face flushing again, her dark long hair curtaining the side of her face.

"Hello."

Her roommate moved to her open suitcase and proceeded to start refolding everything into perfect piles.

"My name is Bella," she offered, trying to warm up to her.

"I'm Rosalie," she responded ten seconds later.

Bella decided to leave the obviously stuck-up girl be and started rearranging her books in alphabetical order by author.

"What are you studying?" Rosalie offered in a cold, bored voice.

Happy that her roommate was giving it a try, she responded enthusiastically, "Geology, you?"

Rosalie rolled her eyes and glared at her, putting her shirt down and standing up straight and menacing.

"Well, I'm in Biomedical Science, so you're going to have to let me study and not party. Got it?"

Bella rolled her eyes and turned back toward her bookshelf.

"Excuse me, you didn't answer my question."

Bella, sick of trying to be polite, responded bitchily, "You can only apply into that when you're in your Junior year. You're in basic General Science. Get over yourself."

Rosalie gave Bella a look that could kill and flipped open her phone, calling someone unknown and ranted about Bella right in front of her.

Bella wasn't going to sit and take it so she left the room and ran smack into Mr. Heart Stopper himself.

"Woah, watch where you're going, would ya?"

"Oh, fuck off."

"Is it that time of month?" Heart Stopper asked with a mocking smirk. Bella glared at him and he wisely changed course. "Uh, do you know if Rosalie has moved in yet? I have yet to meet her..."

"She's unpacking. Blonde hair. Blue eyes. Long legs. Bitch. You can't miss her."

Heart Stopped leaned his head back and let out a hearty laugh.

Bella stared at him with an odd look and once he noticed her expression tried to explain. "You pretty much described every girl that goes to this school."

"Uhh, and who am I?"

"Well you're one of the odd ones out. Most girls don't have dark hair, brown eyes, and their skin is usually artificially tanned…" he quipped, staring her up and down, noticing her sun-kissed skin.

"Ugh, are you telling me the school is infested with Barbie and matching Ken dolls?" Bella seethed, feeling defeated. How was she to win a guy's heart when there was an ample selection of every twenty-year-old's wet dream?

"Well, you do have the bitch part down pact. You'll fit right in, brown hair and all," he said as he turned toward her door.

Bella couldn't help but notice how his but looked phenomenal in those shorts. He definitely worked out.

"Oh, and Bella?" he said over his shoulder.

Bella lifted her eyes, flushing upon realization that he had caught her eyeing his ass.

"I prefer brunettes," he smirked before walking into her room to meet the bleached-blond doctor-wannabe.

Bella gave him a glare as her face turned pink, and angrily stomped off to try and locate the awful communal bathrooms.

* * *

Finally finding the small building hidden behind a random park in the middle of campus, Bella made her way up the stairs and stood leaning against the wall on the other side of the hall. No one was around yet, and Bella started feeling more out of place than ever. She was eighteen minutes early to her first class, despite the fact that she stepped out onto campus over a half hour before.

Bella silently cursed her advanced placement into the sophomore class, having completed the first year requirements in a nearby college from her home. She didn't see much of a point paying full price for four years when she could stay home and pay a low cost for a year. She didn't know anyone, and her res mates were all enrolled in freshmen classes together.

Ten minutes and two quick games of Minesweeper on her phone later, she noticed students starting to wait around her, talking enthusiastically about summer trips to Europe and their summer romances.

Bella, too shy to immerse herself into their conversations right away, continued to play with her phone, eavesdropping on the conversations happening around her. She noticed that most of her classmates were male, and all were athletic looking. She didn't expect any different. This school was known for its beautiful students, which kept those too insecure with their appearance at bay, which reinforced the "beautiful student body" statement even more. It was definitely a never-ending cycle.

Finally, the students in the class before hers rolled out of the classroom, and as Bella picked up her bag off the ground, noticed a good-looking guy holding the door open for them, handing something out to each student.

Bella made her way toward the door, aware that this was it; she was about to attend her first lecture. As she entered, her eyes caught the cute stranger's blue eyes, and he smiled warmly, handing her a small piece of paper.

As she made her way to a seat in the back, she noticed that most of the twenty or so students were taking up the first few rows, eagerly pulling out their MacBooks. She moved up a few rows, not wanting to be excluded, and took out her own MacBook to hide behind. While Bella was good at one-on-one interactions, she wasn't all too comfortable in a group setting unless she knew the other participants.

A small Asian man walked into the lecture hall carrying a cardboard box. The cute blue-eyed guy holding open the door grabbed the box from him and placed it on the desk by the front row. Bella couldn't help admire how polite this guy was, and she liked the backpack he had slung over his left shoulder. It was obviously bought elsewhere, and didn't fit into the JanSport style everyone around the school seem to fit into. It was full of bright colors, and sewed and definitely hand-made. She liked it, and found herself wanting to ask him where he got it.

The professor looked at the clock on the wall and then cleared his throat. Everyone immediately shut up and turned toward him, eager to start off the school year.

"Hey guys, I'm Cam. I know most of you from the intro courses last year," he started as he scanned the room for familiar faces, giving the occasional head nod and smile. "Before we go over the syllabus, I'm going to give the stage over to Mike over here." He gestured toward the colorful-backpack wearing cutie.

"Hey guys," Mike said with ease and a little wave. "As most of you know, we have a Geology Club here for the department. I'm the Sophomore Executive, though I'm a Junior. Therefore, I've taken these courses, so feel free to ask me for help.

"Keep the slips of paper I handed to you in a safe place. It has my contact information, and the room number for the clubroom, and all that jazz. So, uh, yeah. Check it out and hope to see your faces around the department. Have fun, Cam here is a blast," he finished with a smile directed toward the professor, his blonde hair gleaming in the sun shining through the skylight.

* * *

Bella dropped onto her severely uncomfortable single bed with a huff, exhausted and in dire need of a nap.

Unfortunately, Rose was Skyping away, talking loudly to friends and not taking into account that she should be accommodating to her roommate.

"Ugh, Rose, can you please put earphones in and talk in a lower volume, I'm trying to sleep."

Rosalie paused, looked up at Bella, smiled, and replied, "It's Rosalie." She turned back to her MacBook and starting giggling and gossiped in a higher tone than before.

"Bitch," Bella mumbled under her breath as she covered her ears with a pillow. She was starting to really regret not paying more money for a single room. She didn't want to prove her parents wrong, so she'd have to learn how to cope.

She BBMed her brother, telling him she'd settled in and had an amazing first day of school. She asked him how his job was coming along, interested in his response, which would mean he had forgiven her for leaving.

Seeing as Barbie wasn't going to end her Skype session anytime soon, Bella got off her bed and gathered her books into her bag. She headed out the door, slamming it behind her before heading toward the campus library.

As she packed up her belongings, she checked her phone, upset upon realizing her brother hadn't responded.

* * *

As she headed toward the library, she noticed Mike was talking on his iPhone, pacing back and forth in front of the doors. He noticed her, and his eyes lit up in recognition. He held up his finger, and she stopped and readjusted her backpack on her shoulders. He hung up his phone with a "Got to run," and jammed it into his pocket.

"Hey, you're the girl from the second year earth sci lecture I visited this morning, right?"

Bella's heart swelled at the fact that he remembered her, even though there were twenty something other individuals in the room, and despite the fact he graced their presence for a mere ten minutes.

"Yeah," she responded with a smile. "You're the guy who gave a presentation."

"Guilty. Anyway, I was heading to the Starbuck's in the Campus Centre. You're welcome to join… unless you have other plans?"

Bella thought about Ice Bitch Skyping her annoying friends and smiled toward Mike. "Let's go."

* * *

**Follow me on Twitter: 024Maria and review, review review. If I get enough feedback, I'll post Chapter 2! :D**


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